In From Both Eyes, Macmillan looks her shadows in the eye, and then lets them breathe, giving them care and attention. During the time surrounding the record, she was writing voraciously, a delayed processing of these emotions that came to the surface when she was 23. In the privacy and solitude of her small, ground-level apartment where rainwater would seep through the floorboards, her songs also couldn’t be restrained. The album opens with angst in the song ‘Mad, Sometimes,’ evoking the confusion of being in your 20s and ending a relationship in search of something bigger.

This inner turmoil continues in ‘Both Eyes Now,’ but this time paired with tenderness and introspection, as she begins “to see it all as blooming.” Beginning to hold the darkness, to understand it, and come to peace with it. Later, in the song ‘Emerge,’ the lyrics open with, “take it as it comes in waves, the same as before.” This speaks to riding out an emotional low, with patience and understanding it will pass. And then “taking… time to reframe the memories,” to heal.

These are songs about love and heartbreak, but through a different frame. They hinge on the process of self-discovery through loving and losing another, then seeing what’s left when you venture out on the other side. They’re deeply personal, and also speak to a shared experience through conversations with loved ones about mental health, queerness, heartbreak and self-love. These conversations matter so much, as she sings in the song ‘America, Anywhere’, of finding that person who makes her feel “like I don’t live in America”.

The breadth of these songs led Nan towards a full and epic soundscape, while still holding onto intimacy. The songs dance between indie rock, Americana and electronic music. Some are made for listening alone in your room, others for a dance floor, and others for driving down the highway. She pushes against the boundaries of what she’s previously made, capturing the sounds of 80s pop, alternative rock, and electronic music, weaving them together with her folk and singer-songwriter history. These songs require more open landscapes to live within, so she created this sonically with her band and co-producer Alex Bingham. From Both Eyes is the story of Macmillan finding and returning to her core and taking the time to comprehend the balance of both light and darkness within.

Nan recorded this album with a group of musicians who handled the songs with care and passion, bringing their own ideas together for a week in a house on Smith Mountain Lake in western Virginia. Bingham co-led production and played bass and synth, with Matt McCaughan (Bon Iver) on drums, percussion and synth, her long-time friend Tyler Hutcherson on piano and synth, Kim McMasters on electric guitar, and Saman Khoujinian engineering and adding electric guitar and synth. Other special guests made appearances in the months following, including Chessa Rich and Joseph Terrel (Mipso). With Macmillan on acoustic and electric guitar and vocal, adding in some synth and piano, this group joined together to create a bold and intimate conversation with the heart in this soaring debut.